Calgon take me away . . .

6:28 am I awake 2 minutes before my alarm b/c I hear my husband changing Kate's diaper.
6:41 am I hear all 3 older kids awake--I say good bye for good to my plans to get up before my kids and work out/shower.
7:08 Clara in melt down mode b/c she's tired and hungry. (yesterday she had a temp of 102)
7:45 I shower blissfully ignorant and happy. Clara crying somewhere.
8:08 I realize James has totally filled his underwear with diarrhea. Clara crying somewhere.
8:50 Poop cleaned up. Heading to the dentist. Clara happy. Drugs must be working.
10:20 Leaving the dentist--small filling ends up being 2 huge fillings. Dentist warns I might have some sensitivity when the Novocain wears off.
10:30 Arrive home. Clara in bed. Grandma is pretty sure my 19 year old niece who babysat will never have kids after watching mine.

11:30 James off to school

12:00 Clara up & crying. Kate still sleeping in HER crib.

3:00 Clara still crying. I check on Kate who is now in her sister's crib? (there's 2 feet separating them) and has covered it in diarrhea. I let her sleep.

3:30 I try to put Clara down for a nap

4:00 start cleaning up Kate and poop. Clara awake.

4:15 Kate in shower. Clara splits her lip open somehow. Perfect boy Andrew starting to fuss, but not frantic yet.

4:40 Kate out of shower and in Andrew's crib. Clara in Andrew's crib crying because Kate's in it as well. James in Andrew's crib making Kate cry. James crying because Kate won't give him the laundry basket (the contents of which are now dumped all over the floor). I am frantically trying to finish cleaning the poop infested bathroom. Perfect boy Andrew getting frantic.

5:00 Roast over cooked. Potatoes not even started. Kids are getting mac n' cheese.

5:10 mac n' cheese now all over floor. James in time out. Kate is missing her diaper.

5:20 James asks to play on porch. I say ok.

5:30 I realize James as taken saplings soaking in muddy water and painted the front porch, door and windows with mud. James in time out. Kate is missing her diaper again.

5:35 Front porch washed off. James has taken his juice and poured it out on the window sill. James in time out.

5:45 Clara still crying. Kate missing her diaper again. James may never leave time out again. Novocain has worn off and Tooth is Killing me!

6:03 I go to check on James. He has fallen asleep on his bed in the laundry bag:

6:10 I let Clara & Kate play in the bathroom sink. Hey, at least they're not crying. Except Clara keeps trying to push Kate off the chair.

6:20 Clara alone in bathroom, crying. I take her (while holding Andrew) to the bench at the kitchen table and tell her I'll get her ice cream. I turn my back. She fall flat on her face. I lay Andrew on the floor (now crying) and pick up Clara (now hysterical).

6:30 I notice a suspicious yellow puddle under the chair where naked Kate had been standing.

6:40 Clara to bed.

6:48 Kate and I call Daddy to find out Where in the Heck is he?!?

6:53 Dad home. I survived.

On the positive note today: I spent ample time staring lovingly into Perfect Boy Andrew's eyes. I remembered tummy time for Andrew. I made pretty good Pad Thai from scratch for lunch. I got the Kitchen and a bathroom clean. I didn't cause bodily harm to any one of my children.