Are we having fun yet?

Summary of photos (counter clockwise):

Kate crying because she didn't get her way.

Clara on a table causing mischief; her favorite place to be.

James crying because he wants to ride in the stroller, girls happy/indifferent.

James happy because he gets to ride, girls unhappy and kicking brother.

Ok, so this week I get an A++++++ for effort. I had a childhood friend, Zina, visiting her sister up in northern Washington. She invited me up to visit, and I just couldn't pass it up. I entreated my mother to come along as a helper and we made the trek. It really went pretty well, except for the 40 minutes of screaming from my girls at my aunt's house before they fell asleep. And the moment Zina opened the door and Kate greeted her by throwing up all over the carpet. James screaming and wailing at the ice cream store because he wanted mommy's "big" ice cream. Oh, and then we stopped at Jack-in-the-box to let the kids stretch as eat dinner on the way home. While I'm trying to order: James is pushing the stack of highchairs into random people's tables, Kate is running barefoot around the restaurant, Clara is on the table dumping my purse out on the floor, which Kate later dumping a FULL glass of water onto. My mom placated James by pushing Kate around the restaurant in a highchair, putting her in "time out" in random locations--his favorite? He wanted to put her in the toilet.
I'm pretty sure in the midst of all of this I got a chance to visit with my friends, see some gorgeous scenery, and do something other than sit around the house all day long.

Am I a glutton for punishment??

So, I try again. Justin went up the the cabin to go hunting this weekend. For various reasons, he was going to be by himself, so I decided to take the kids up and keep him company. Any of you with kids know how much work it is to pack for vacations with kids. But I made it! The kids and I got up there during daylight hours with enough time for a trip to the lake. I was totally prepared for the rainy weather any everything. Kids were in bed by 7. I got some solo time to read and eat brownies before Justin got there.

Everything seemed okay.

I should have been warned.

It never goes this simple.

About 12 midnight James starts talking in his sleep about being cold. We can't seem to warm him up. We move him in the bed next to me. Next thing I know, in the dark, I hear gagging sounds. NOT GOOD. James throws up ALL OVER HIMSELF. 3 times. Needless to say, when Kate threw up a bit the next day, and I wasn't feeling so hot, I bailed. The kids and I came home the next day at 10 am. All that work for nothing. But hey, I get an A++ for effort, right??

There are MANY, MANY, MANY moments when I am over whelmed by the thought that I will have another baby to add to the mix in 5 months. That EVERY LAST THING I DO FOR THE NEXT 4 YEARS WILL BE PHYSICALLY EXHAUSTING. I dream about the day when I can get out of the house and go back to school or go to work or go anywhere but crazy. It's not the cleaning up after kids that I mind--it's the cleaning up the SAME &%$@# THING 4 TIMES IN 6 MINUTES while one kid slips in it and cracks her head and other one tracks it into the living room before I can get it cleaned up that I mind. It's not how hard it is to do anything with 3 kids, it's how hard it is, and then it doesn't work that gets to me. Really, I dream about going back to work, and getting to hire someone else to change diapers, and clean up messes and argue with nonsensical 3 year and 16 month olds. I would love going to school just so I can sit down for more that 15 minutes straight.

I KNOW! I KNOW! I KNOW!

If I was back at work I would be dreaming about the moments I was missing with my kids. When James gives his sisters hugs and kisses and offers them toys, when Kate does a head stand and then looks up to make sure you clap for her, when Clara offers to share her sucking thumb with you. I know there are so many rewards and blessings right now from being home with my kids. I know I dreamed of these days for years when I couldn't have the family I wanted. It's all a great blessing in disguise as a tornado right? I just have to weather the storm.

Where's my poncho?